How Separated Parents Can Prepare For Holiday Access To Their Kids

Holidays can be difficult for separated parents.  Everyone wants to spend time with their children, especially during the holidays.  Deciding on a schedule that works best for your children can be especially difficult when there are extended family events to plan around and when one or both of you want to travel.  

Start Early

In order to avoid as much conflict as possible, start early.  If you and your ex can communicate with each other, ask when he or she wants to spend time with the children during the holidays and advise him or her of your plans.  If you get an invitation to a holiday party, let your ex know as soon as possible so that you can plan around any conflicting schedules before it’s too late.

Be Reasonable

Most importantly, be reasonable.  I am sure that you want to spend all holidays with your children, but odds are that your ex does too, and that your children want to spend time with both of you. .  

Think of compromises

For example, if you were with the children on Christmas Day last year, offer this day to your ex this year and ask for Boxing Day or Christmas Eve instead.  If you really want to spend the first night of Chanukah with the children, ask your ex if he or she wants to spend the last night with them.